Saturday, February 12, 2005

Sleepy Saturday

Great night last night. The band played well, and as I had hoped I was able to really connect with a few friends. fuck'n brilliant.

I have this creative idea that I am trying to develop. For the first time in a long time in my life, I am feeling excited for the future, and surrounded by interesting possibilities. This is almost entirely due to the implementation of my creative ideas and the resulting self-actualization (see post: motivation - it makes scientific sense). I notice that when I talk about my ideas and the way I feel about them, I generally get three different types of responses from people:

1)"Oh, that's nice" subtext: "I'm glad you're happy but I don't understand why this is so important to you, as it doesn't seem to bring in money or career enhancement"

2)"That's good, but I'm depressed about______" subtext: "I'm not sure how happy I really am for you because your happiness is making me feel insecure about my life"

3)"Wow, what can I do to get involved" subtext: "your enthusiasm is infectious and I appreciate somebody who is in touch with their creative desires"

Now I KNOW I'm generalizing here, and of course some people have a mix of the three reactions, but it has become apparent to me in talking with other people that there are different reactions based on personal experience. My favorite reaction is #3, for obvious reasons, but lets talk about the others:

#1 is so out of touch with the inner desire to be creative, that they do not understand that creativity is not a means to an end ($$) but is exciting in and of itself. These are the people that get caught up in the corporate world, stay in the same job for 25 years, and then complain bitterly at how unfair the world is because they haven't gotten everything they wanted out of life. All the while, they never even think to take control of their own situation or question the status quo.

#2 fears that they will never get what they want out of life, but at the same time is afraid to take the necessary steps to go for what they want in life (an interesting paradox, that one). I feel bad for #2 because they want to access their creativity, but are held back from doing anything about it. I myself have fallen into this trap before, but am hoping to keep out of it in the future.

I am fortunate to be surrounded by enough people in the #3 category to keep myself creatively motivated on a regular basis. I hope all of these people in turn, find something that excites them, so that I can be a supporter in their creative endeavors.


Anonymous Erin said...

Aha, I know when you wrote this post... Unfortunately, number 2 sounds all to familiar. I'm sorry I'm not more supportive of your ideas. My boyfriend complains about the same thing. It's funny... growing up in a society that stresses scarcity and competition, we seem (or at least I seem) to have this deeply ingrained, irrational feeling that somehow happiness is a limited commodity. And then there's also the issue that (and this is especially twisted) I find it easier to relate to, and have empathy for, people who are unhappy. And of course, if you are distracted with your own problems, it sometimes takes a concerted effort to put those distressing thoughts out of your head so you can listen properly. Good reasons? No. But reasons nonetheless. I must stop thinking of them as excuses for my poor behaviour and start thinking of them as obstacles which, once understood, can be overcome.

4:04 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home