Wednesday, March 16, 2005

This is the part where we really start to get our "one voice"

Nigel just wrote my thoughts today:

"Now I have to time manage and actually figure out a way to optimize my deliverable out-put. I need to be very motivated right now. I need to produce something that someone can have and hold.

And, damnit, I actually want to…I want to rise to the challenge and prove to myself that I am not an impostor."

I'm not sure what project Nigel was referring to, and it may not matter because the message is very clear - and I think most of us can relate to the thoughts above (and below.) It's like the very rare moment where a door opens - an opportunity presents itself, and here's the kicker, we actually recognize it. So much of our lives go by with us being blind to those opportunities. When we fail to recognize thosde open doorways we often feel victims of chance, like a tiny boat tossed along a rough sea. Occasionally however, we see the opportunities before they arise and we feel ourselves taking that important first step towards what could be a life altering experience. Those moments are magical. They are the moments that have the potential to evolve us.

So I will tell you about my opportunity, in the hopes that it will help me rise to the challenge and prove I am not an imposter:

I've talked about my filmmaking aspirations before. I've also talked about how I do alot of "volunteer" filmmaking for friends and not for profit organizations so that I can "be what I want to be" and build my portfolio. Today something new happened. Now I haven't advertised, and nobody that I've filmed has seen my work yet (that to me is a big deal in relation to what comes next.) Somebody has offered to pay me to film them.

It was a referral - a friend of a friend. Keep in mind though neither the friend nor the person that has requested my services has seen my work - this is all based on faith.

And I'm scared that if I charge this person and they don't like what I do, the positive word of mouth that I've developed so far will become negative word of mouth before I even get started. I'm worried that I'm not ready yet, and shouldn't be taking paid gigs. I worry about the potential to damage my reputation and the goodwill of the friend that referred me.

They say "make hay when the sun shines" and maybe this is time to take a big chance - maybe this is my doorway, my opportunity. I hope I don't make a fool of myself.

Into the deep water with both feet and no flotation device.

Time to learn to swim.


Blogger Rosa Say said...

Go for it Jay!
You can do it and it will be fabulous I'm sure: I have faith in you.

12:58 PM  
Blogger Jay said...

Thanks for the encouragement Rosa. It's wonderful to have you "on my team"

1:57 PM  
Blogger Target Market said...

Congratulations, Jay! This is how it starts. I have no doubt that with your passion, and your faith in the universe, things will snowball for you and you will soon find yourself doing the work you love. I also have no doubt that you are up to the task.

And I finally got my next post done, so there. I'm going to try and be more consistent about it, but my posts always just get so long that it can become overwhelming to try and finish them!

9:49 AM  

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